How To Avoid Becoming A "Pushover Parent."

Local psychologist has advice to parents

SANTA BARBARA, Calif. - Do your kids call the shots around the house?  Do you have trouble setting and sticking to boundaries?  Or just a hard time saying no?  You might be a Pushover Parent.

Santa Barbara psychologist Dr. Kimberley Taylor says your kids need boundaries to survive in the real world.  The job of parents is to give children real-life experiences.

So how do you keep from being a pushover parent?  Taylor gives these four pieces of advice.

#1.  Set structure and set limits.  
The key to success at disciplining your child lies within you ability to be consistent and predictable about what is expected of them and to enforce consequences for bad behavior.

#2  Privileges are earned
Kids should learn that privileges come with being responsible and they need  to be earned.  Privilege without responsibility is a recipe for disaster.

#3  Stop doing everything for your child.
Let them get frustrated with a task and try to work it out on their own. Don't jump to their rescue to relieve your anxiety.

#4  Be their parent not their buddy.
It is a kid's job is to push the boundaries to see how far they can go to explore their own potential.  And the parents job is to teach them appropriate limits.  If you are too permissive they will grow up to be selfish and demanding adults.

You can catch Dr. Kimberley Taylor on her radio show Thursday from 2 p.m.- 3 p.m. on 1290 KZSB-AM.   You can call in to ask her questions or listen to her show live on

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